81. Chim Chim Cheeree

Day: October 2, 2011

Admission: Today was a surprise play day. Quintessential California lovin', on rooftops, no less.

80. Happy Pretend Birthday

Day: October 1, 2011

Admission: Back in LA, time for Russ' belated birthday celebration. Wine, gluten free cupcakes, happiness.

79. Touchdown

Day: September 30, 2011

Place: Fallbrook, CA

Admission: Home, finally. Rest and repack. Maybe a margarita or two.

78. Stormy

Day: September 29, 2011

Place: Cassandra's Casa, Joes, Plane Tarmac for 2 hours, Drunkies at LAX

77. Au Revoir

Day: September 28, 2011

Place: Street Cafe, Basillica Cistern, Highest Terrace, Plane back to States

76. One Last Night

Day: September 27, 2011

Place: Balcony Room, Sultanahmet, Istanbul, Turkey

75. Up

Day: September 26, 2011

Place: Balloon Ride, Carpets, Pots, Turkish Night, Bread Break In, Room Service

74. Cavewoman

Day: September 25, 2011

Place: Fairy Chimneys, Wine Tasting, Open Air Museum, Gamirasu, Cappadocia, Turkey

73. Crystal Clear

Day: September 24, 2011

Place: Domabachi Palace, Bosphorus Cruise, Doy Doy, Hookah and Paper Flowers

72. Oh Yum

Day: September 23, 2011

Place: Blue Mosque, Hagia Sophia, Topapki Palace, Grand Bazarr, Rooftop Terrace, 360, Istanbul, Turkey

71. Welcome to Turkey

Day: September 22, 2011

Place: Istanbul, Turkey

70. If I could I would Live Here

Day: September 21, 2011

Place: New York City, New York

69. Empire State of Mind

Day: September 20, 2011

Place: New York City, New York

68. Crunch time

Day: September 19, 2011

Song: 

Meal: Oatmeal with frozen berries

Admission: I'm writing this in the last few hours before my flight to Turkey (!!!!!!!) I'm going to have to be on a bit of a hiatus for the next 10 days. Today was nice... slightly pressured, but relatively calm. Coffee at Susina (yum, my favorite!) work with Le Pain Quotidien, a last minute FedEx delivery, surprise drinks at the Culver Hotel, a traffic-free commute, and an insanely clumsy cluttered packing job.

Up in 3 hours. Here we go.

67. Jump for Joy!

Day: September 18, 2011

Song: Om Nashi Me, by Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros

Meal: Matcha Green Tea with White Chocolate Drizzle Scone

Admission: Today was blissful! Helped James' wife Kei at her stand at the LARCHMONT, of all streets, Farmers Market; worked with Beth who was awesome selling scones and tea and just being cute. Afterwards met up with Russ for an impromptu hike at Griffith Park. Couldn't get enough of how nice it was outside so we went out for outdoor margaritas at Malo in Silverlake. Afterwards we opted for a 5 second long rooftop photoshoot and ended the night watching Megamind which was funny, but not as good as BofG. I'm so happppyyyyyy its ridiculous. 

66. Recharge

Day: September 17, 2011

Song: Maps, by Yeah Yeah Yeahs

Meal: Pasta Frumento + 305953 breadsticks.

Admission: I left LA today around 7:30, stopping at Starbucks of all god awful places because it was the only thing I could find that was open for some much needed caffeine. When I got home I ran a few errands (including depositing my first real paycheck!) and by 12 I just crashed. Slept for 3 hours and then woke up to have a Skype date with Amy for Turkey preparations. We couldn't stop squealing every 10 seconds. I packed pretty haphazardly for about an hour when Noah arrived. It was so so so nice to see him. Chips and  salsa on the deck and then Italian at a packed Trupianos for dinner. I miss him a lot.

65. Hipstamatic

Day: September 16, 2011

Song: Santogold

Meal: Prosecco and Baby Bell

Admission: There was something different about today. Work had this irrepressable cheerfulness; everyone was just so HAPPY. And as it got ridiculously nuts in the last half hour (of course!), my boss decides to pour everyone a glass of wine. Like... really? Could they be any more of my soulmates? Afterwords I met up with Russ where we had a rooftop picnic, then met up with Addison, Michele and friends for a mysterious adventure in Echo Park. I couldn't stop laughing. There were lasers and a band and a boxing ring. Everyone we were with just made me smile and I've never felt more glad to be alive and able to experience.

64. Smooth

Day: September 15, 2011

Song: Wake Up, Arcade Fire

Meal: Watermelon Radish and Ahi Tuna Salad

Admission: Today just ran really smoothly. Work went by steady, nothing stressful, no painful lulls. I chose lunch to be Lemonade, which was adorable and delicious and well received (bows, bows). Met up with Russ afterwards at La Poubelle, which is kind of becoming our go-to spot (can't get enough of those Marie Antoinette glasses); we were going to go to see Contagion at the Vista but got over it and just went and sat and talked on his roof that overlooks Hollywood. Headed home and now I'm going to sleep. So there.

63. Foggy

Day: September 14, 2011

Song: Blink 182 Pandora

Meal: Wasabi Shrimp Salad

Admission: Ah, yes, the post birthday blues. After so much love and excitement, the day after always seems to be rather lackluster. Work was productive but slow; we all got really wonky by the end of it, despite, or perhaps because of, drinking a healthy amount of red bulls. It was my first time commuting straight back to the valley and, I was right, it sucks. Sat by myself waiting for Libby to get home, listening to Biscuits and Gravy and prepping for my pancake party tomorrow. Once Libby arrived, we broke into our last bottle of Prosecco and ended the night blasting Mumford and Sons, doing air guitar banjo, and nearly peeing our pants.

62. Birthday!

Day: September 13, 2011

Song: Give Me The Beat, Ghostland Observatory

Meal: Lemon Albacore Roll

Admission: 

Best. Birthday. Ever.

Work took me out to lunch, and if that wasn't enough, gave me gorgeous, very thoughtful prezzies from anthro.

Took Amanda home, got to bond.

Rooftop sushi, super hipster bar, and cupcakes to round out the night.

I'm in heaven.

61. Gettin' Close

Day: September 12, 2011

Song: Apply, Glasser

Meal: Edamame Hummus Salad

Admission: I'd like to recognize today for three things. 

1. Libby and I had our applications approved for Lanewood. All we need is a deposit and the place is OURS. Ahhhhhhhh.

2. My birthday is tomorrow. Wooooooooo.

3. This was me at the check out line today. Thirsty?

60. Princess time

Day: September 11, 2011

Song: Ces Bottes Son Faites Pour Marches, Eileen

Meal: Grilled Citrus Salmon with Lemon Rice 

Admission: It feels weird first of all to have this be the tenth anniversary of September 11th; you can't help but reflect back to where you were exactly when you heard what had happened. It's a defining moment in our generation and my heart goes out to all those affected personally. It makes me incomprehensibly thankful for my family and health and wellbeing. 

Today was very mellow; went to Primo to start apartment hunting online in case Lanewood falls though (fingers crossed we get that, dear please baby Jesus). Then I spent the rest of the day packing and being lazy. Tonight my parents followed me up to Dana Point for a pre-actual-birthday celebration dinner at the Chart House; INCREDIBLE food. And dessert. And drinks. And setting. I'm so happy.

59. Twirl Baby

Day: September 10, 2011

Song: Sail, Awolnation

Meal: Cheese and Veggie Appetizer + Wine

Admission: Oh happy day! Up and out early from Libby's to drive home; first stop was in Temecula to meet my mom to pick out my new frames! Teaser... they are Chloe... oo la la. Then it was home to prep for wedding. Then it was the actual wedding! So so much fun. Shannon looked beautiful and so happy; such a joy to be around such happiness. I danced a LOT. 

58. Surreal

Day: September 9, 2011

Song: Modern Man, Arcade Fire

Meal: Teriyaki Tofu Salad

Admission: Today was a bit of a blur. I completed my first week at work, which was a mix of satisfying and stressful. Then, as has become the trend, I headed back up to Hollywood to hang out. Tonight's adventures began at La Poubelle for some champagne, the Cat and Fiddle courtyard for some dinner, and ended with Birds and the Good Luck somethingorother for other ridiculousness. 

I can't keep up with my life these days. All I know is that I'm really enjoying it. 

57. The One?

Day: September 8, 2011

Song: Someone Great, LCD Soundsystem

Meal: Black Quinoa and Orange Salad

Admission: My head literally won't stop spinning. I've felt like I've had no head for the past 16 hours. Work FLEW by again; it's so odd, I feel like I haven't learned my job well enough to keep occupied, and yet 5:30 rolls around before I know it, and it's time for me to start shutting down the office. But as the last three days have proven, my night's only beginning once work ends. Today I headed up to check out the La Brea apartment to get an application; turns out the place has already rented but we might have a chance if they don't deposit. But then I went into the Ralphs right down the street and got SO SKETCHED OUT by the people and surrounding area, so it made the disappointment of most likely not getting the perfect interior place a little easier to swallow and accept. I called Libby just to check in and it turned out she was on her way to checkout Lanewood, which I saw a few weeks ago and really liked but never moved on. So I decided to meet her; we met up with Alex, the manager, and just sort of became smitten by it all. The room, the management, the pool, the balcony, the ceilings.... it would be a lot smaller than La Brea but cozy and in an AMAZING location. So in a mad frenzy we went home, popped in a frozen pizza, and got going filling out our application. Alex made it sound like its going to be gone asap, and we just got really attached. Our hopes are up, to say in the least. Hopefully we'll hear back tomorrow about moving forward, and if not, we'll have to start looking all over. DREAD.

These past few days have just been a complete 180 from the first 8 months of my life this year, it's hard to grasp. It also contributes to me feeling like: how the hell did this happen to me? How am I so lucky?

I keep waiting for someone to say just kidding, this is too good to be true! Back to where you belong!

Please, please no.

56. Can't Keep Up

Day: September 7, 2011

Song: Turn Me On, by David Guetta and Nicki Minaj

Meal: Ceviche and Rosemary Bread

Admission: I feel like I'm almost panting to catch up to my day--again, which I LOVE. Had to open up the office this morning so got there a little before 8:30 to get the coffee going and all the machines turned on. Then for some reason I was just SO. BUSY. The day started flying by and I was busy non-stop-- such an improvement from yesterday where I felt like I needed to wait to be told what to do because I couldn't think of anything on my own. No doubt my work is still clumsy and not as efficient as it should or could be, but I have faith that I'll come around. The last half hour was nuts; went on a run that was just insanity, one that included the pick up of 6 Jamba Juices. Finally got back to the office in one piece, and after closing down my duties I was out and off back up to the Hollywood Hills to check out yet another apartment. This one... I loved the street, I loved the view, I loved the courtyard... the apartment itself TRIED to be nice, but it was so. flipping. tiny. Did not compare to the La Brea one I saw last night. So now it's down to LB and Lanewood Pines. Eeek! After the apartment Russ and I went out to dinner at Figero in Los Feliz; awesome as usual. Already another celeb citing: Ashley from Greek! Hahaha. 

Back home now, ready to be up and out and do it again. Bring it on!

Oh, ps, I scored a sweet Sweet Shop bag today. YEA!

55. I'm a Big Girl

Day: September 6, 2011

Song: Back in Your Head, Tegan and Sara

Meal: Gem Lettuce and Avocado Salad from Little Doms

Admission: Today was how I wish every day in my life was. Just so FULL. A day that you never have a moment to rest, but it's not stressful; a day where the events make you reflect on yourself, your abilities, your personality, your wants. I started my job today; overwhelmed by the kindness of my office. Afterwards I headed north to hang out with Russ; champagne in Marie Antionette glasses next to a painted mural of the Eiffel tower; apartment hunting with a mean eastern european lady; and dinner at Little Doms with John C Reilly. Like what? Too good.

Today was my first day of the rest of my life.

54. Flyin'

Day: September 5, 2011

Song: Some song by Joy Formidable

Meal: Quinoa with asparagus and snow peas

Admission: Whew! Long day. Up at 4am west coast time. Bozeman-->Denver-->LAX-->SD-->Back to LA. Blew up my blow up bed (which is huge and rather comfy), unpacked the suitcase so it feels like I kind of live here, did a little basic grocery shopping,  and am now ready to pass out. Going to get up super early because I don't even want to risk being even CLOSE to late. At this very moment in time I'm feeling calm. I think my biggest fear is that I'll get there and just my mind will go blank and not be able to think through basic tasks; that I'll just freeze out of the fear and pressure to do everything perfectly.

Let's hope that doesn't. 

Bed time. Night night.

53. L! Is for the way...

Day: September 4, 2011

Song: Livin on Prayer, by Bon Jovi

Meal: Trout with Grilled Veggies

Admission: To be honest... I'm drunk. Today consisted of so-so bagel breakfast, gettin my hair did, off to the beautiful mountains for Daniel's wedding, and a somewhat disheartening rejection on the dance floor from the wedding party, the only group of people my age. I'm ok though! Ready to be home, it's beautiful here but just not for me.

Here's me and my grandpa, the MOST badass guy around.

52. Mountain Chic

Day: August 3, 2011

Song: Violet Hill, Coldplay

Meal: Bag of Chocolate Covered Pretzels

Admission: I write to you from my Marriot hotel room in Bozeman, Montana. I got up early today and got a big sized Primo so that I could be packed and ready to go. Our plane got delayed 2 hour but we had a 3 hour layover planned in Denver so it actually worked out perfect. Got a pick me up glass of wine in Colorado and then headed off in one of those scary little baby planes to Bozeman. Waited what seemed like forever for our rental car (glistening white mini van... classy...) and got a much anticipated dinner and beverage... mmm. Nothing really exciting happened today, tomorrow is the big day, the wedding day, eeeee. Weddings are my favorite. 

Also, so are cans of club soda as my plane beverage of choice. Little fun fact.

51. Which One Which One?!

Day: August 2, 2011

Song: Fluorescent Adolescent, by Arctic Monkeys

Meal: Shrimp Taco

Admission: Aye my head is spinning! Woke up today and had to get on the road to LA with the parents to spend another day apartment hunting. This time my future roomie, Libby, came with us. The first place we checked out was an apartment I tried to see Wednesday but it fell through; it is so freaking charming from  the outside: French awnings, light yellow paint, ivy covered front; the inside is just as cute, I felt like a 50s housewife with the checkerboard floor. Problems: kind of small, kind of dark, and kind of dirty. Next we decided to check out the Chadwick in Koreatown; we had be entertaining this place because of all the amenities (pool, gym, tennis courts), but it took one drive there for us to not even want to see it. It just wasn't worth it, so I guess that was productive. Last place we checked out was on Olive St in West Hollywood-- amazing location, super close to Amy Magrish, and absolutely adorable from the outside with a beautiful courtyard, but whoever built the place must have been an actual idiot... HUGE one bathroom, HUGE bathroom, then one bedroom that honestly could fit maybe a crib, not even a twin bed. It just didn't make sense. So that was a no go also. So as of now its Olympic and a place in Hollywood that I saw a couple of weeks ago. We just have to decide if and when to move on these things. 

It's stressful. I just want to have a place! That I like. That's cute. In a good location. Is that too much to ask?! 

50. Blessed

Day: September 1, 2011

Song: N***as in Paris, Jay Z and Kanye West

Meal: Salami, Cherry Tomatoes and LOTS of wine

Admission: Today marked the first day of one of the biggest life-changing and exciting months in my life thusfar. It was my last day at Urban, which was sort of anti-climatic and sudden feeling, over before it began it seemed. I rushed to Anthro to get some more pretty things for my new to-be apartment and some wedding gifts, and then rushed home to meet Diondra. We went to the grocery store and did all the prep for  my farewell get together I decided to throw sort of last minute. I've been meaning to use our deck all summer for a dinner party and it seemed like now was a good of time as any considering its one of my last nights here as my home! Diondra, Laura, Kendra, Veronica, Kelly, Branche, Andrew and Noah all made it out; it was the best assortment of people, friends from all walks of life--childhood, high school, college, post-grad work-- it was so wonderful to have them all there, for all of them to meet one another, to see them all in Fallbrook before I say goodbye. Besides just talking and drinking I decided to construct a sort of makeshift photo booth with props for us to play with, which turned out to be hilarious.  My stomach hurt from laughing by the end of it. We moved inside and started playing other games, and eventually people slowly started to either fall asleep or head home, and it ended with me in my PJS talking to Andrew and Noah at my kitchen table. Finally we said our last goodbyes and it struck me by how emotional I got; I feel like I haven't had ENOUGH time with these people. I guess I'm just so thankful everything that's happened this year led me to meet who I've met, and I'm confident the friendships I've made will last and last. Tonight was sort of living proof of that.

49. Not the easiest

Day: August 31, 2011

Song: Diamond Dave, by Bird and the Bee

Meal: California Roll

Admission: I am so SLEEPY!  Today was full-- long, enjoyable, stressful... tiring. Slept in later than usual and had to head out to LA not long after with the mom. We checked out apartment number 1, in Palms, which would be super close to my work, and stuck around just to be polite; suffice it to say it was a tiny bit sketch. I had my mom drive me my old Smuggler route to see the houses on Lucerne on our way to Larchmont for lunch. She was awestruck by how pretty and peaceful the neighborhood was, two things you don't think of when thinking LA. At Larchmont Bungalow we had a yummy egg dish and I had fresh squeezed Lemonade. Yum! The next two apartments were, contrary to what we were promised, locked and unable for viewing, so that was stupid. We decided to take a break and head to the Grove to check to see if the Anthro there had the dishes I wanted to get. They didn't, naturally, so I comforted myself by buying a few pretty knob things, because I've always loved them and even though I don't really have any use for them they rock, ok? We waited out the rest of the worst of rush hour by having a glass of wine, and then headed to the last apartment over on Olympic. This place from the outside is precious--light yellow, covered in ivy, black and white awnings; but OF COURSE the woman who was supposed to show us "forgot" and wasn't there. I think this final annoyance might have what been what pushed me and my mom over the edge and we ended up taking it out on each other as we drove home. It wasn't fun because despite the hiccups of the day we remained in good spirits until now and it was just a bad note to end on. We both tried to make amends at dinner, and I think it's ok now.

I'm exhausted. I just want this search to be done now. 

Goodnight.

48. Why Not

Day: August 30, 2011

Song: Freak Out/Starry Eyes, by LCD Soundsystem

Meal: Mediterranean Shrimp Salad with Riesling Vinaigrette

Admission: Today was a bit of a doozy. Met with Alli at Primo for a bit which was nice because we both got to touch base as both of our lives are amping up in craziness and could really reiterate the importance of recovery to one another. It's always nice have a concrete reminder. A few hours later Russ arrived from LA; we had a Final Cut Pro lesson at Primo with large lattes as backup when all of a sudden it was almost three and we hadn't eaten lunch. We decided to drive out to wine country in Temecula for an insanely delicious meal and wine tasting at Faulkner Winery. There we had one of the deepest, most serious talks I've had in a long time; it was important and needed to happen. Ended the day at home with the mother for prosecco and pizza and Anthony Bourdain. Nothing could be better.

47. Productivity

Day: August 29, 2011

Song: You are a Tourist, Death Cab for Cutie

Meal: Shrimp Skewers with Lemon Aoli

Admission: When I think about today I kind of just sit back and think whoa holy cow I did a lot. I woke up at 6 and was unable to fall back asleep. My dad and I headed to Primo and fashioned out a two day itinerary for all the apartment viewings I have--half on Wednesday, half on Friday. Took advantage of the 295893 degree heat and hung out some laundry outside. Mailed Kitty her birthday gift, got shoes for the upcoming wedding this weekend; Then I got called into work, so I showered, ate, and flew like the wind down to Carlsbad. Work was ok, I was ringing and as such went relatively fast---

----- (I'd like to note that I passed out at this point last night writing this, woke up just now with my computer on my stomach) Anyway, after work, I met up with my parents to go meet Julie for my last appointment before LA. It was very emotional and kind of rough, I left feeling kind of wonky so I was glad that I had plans to meet up with Noah and Andrew at 3rd Corner for our traditional Monday wine night. I'm seriously going to miss those two, we always have the best conversation and I really do value their friendship. Night ended with a Zinger, courtesy of Noah. BAM!

46. Hap Hap Happy

Day: August 28, 2011

Song: My Girl, The Temptations

Meal: Amy's Cheeseless Vegetable Pizza

Admission: I slept in WAY late today! Parents woke me up at 9 and took me to coffee to hash out the apartment hunt we'll be doing this coming Friday. Then it was straight to work, which actually flew by as opposed to yesterday which seemed to drag on and on. When I got home my family had Major Market salsa (the best) and chips and frozen margaritas for an after work snack, and it was sitting out in the warm sunshine with them that I admitted that for the first time in a long time I am utterly and completely happy, and by being such I realize how truly blessed I am and how wonderful my life is, and how I am so lucky and so grateful. Sounds super cheesy, but it's so true. Spent the rest of the evening mapping out the apartment route we'll take on Friday, which just keeps adding to the all consuming giddyness and excitement I feel.

45. Mother Love

Day: August 27, 2011

Song: Up Up Up, by Givers

Meal: Chicken Salad Sandwich from Boudin

Admission: Today was all about mother daughter time. Mom took me to Urban and Anthro to capitalize on employee appreciation and score some new goodies for new job and apartment! We booked it to Boudin in  San Marcos for lunch, home of our absolute favorite sandwich, and then she dropped me off for work. Urban sort of dragged on for some reason, despite me being moved to a new spot every hour. It was nice to see my favs there though, those kids get me through the day. Mom picked me up at 7 and we went to dinner at Lotus in Encinitas. Ended the day with some champagne at home, and zonked out early.

44. HIP HIP HOORAY!!!!!!

Day: August 26, 2011

Song: Who Gon Stop Me, by Kanye West and Jay Z

Meal: Proscuitto, Arugula on Baguette Sandwich + Perrier

Admission: Well today is a day for the history books. First of all, I was approximately 4 hours EARLY to my interview... I couldn't sleep and left Lauras at 5:30, when even LA is traffic free. So after driving around drinking a lot of coffee and OJ I finally had my second interview. I was so nervous and couldn't really read my interviewer; he seemed so nice and so chill, but I couldn't tell if he liked me even in the slightest. I left feeling unsure and in many ways unsatisfied. After my interview I went back up to Hollywood to look at an apartment which ended up being pretty nice. Then it was back home; only moments later did I receive a call from The Sweet Shop offering me the position. I was simultaneously stunned, giddy, and overwhelmed. I've been on cloud 9 ever since. The people, the office, the content they producer, I couldn't ask for anything better. I can not express how unbelievably excited and terrified I am.

It's big girl time.

43. Beachside

Day: August 25, 2011

Song:  Mariachi

Meal: Bratwurst with Roasted Peppers and Onions + Strawberry Margarita

Admission: I've really taken to the philosophy that you must capitalize on every chance and every moment you are presented with in each day, because life really is so fragile it's not worth it to push aside and wait till later. After work today I decided to go up to Huntington Beach for Matt's BBQ since he's only home from Boston for a week; then I'd stay with Laura and be that much closer to my interview tomorrow. Before the BBQ Laura and I went out for Margaritas and had a much needed girl catch up talk. I love talking with her, always good conversation with lots of laughs. Then we headed to Matt's beachside house for a BBQ with the usual HB crew minus principals Amy and Borna (I miss them a lot). First of all, the food was BOMB, omg. Secondly, the setting, the people, all of it was so nice. So enjoyable. Then it was off to bed for my 5am wake up call for 2nd interview... eeeeeeeek!

42. Seizing It

Day: August 24, 2011

Song: Brass Monkey, Beastie Boys

Meal: Turkey Burger with Lemony Kale Salad and Roasted Sweet Potatoes + Berry Cup Cocktail

Admission: Dear lord in heaven was today a big day or WHAT. Woke up at 5 and was on the road with the mom at 6 to head up to LA for my interview at The Sweet Shop (um hi, how perfect is that name, by the way? can't you just see the business card?) We were a little bit early so stopped for a coffee and 1 minute dance party to Brass Monkey, the song so oh so randomly playing in Surfa's. As weird as it is to say I really do think that helped calm my nerves, got rid of some of that nervous energy. Then it was time for the interview; the office was so chill, my interveiwers were the nicest people ever, but my interview itself lasted a whole 8 minutes. I was out before I was in. I left sort of bewieldered; I was almost back to my car when I saw Thomas in his pink shirt race after me asking if I wanted to meet with the Executive Producer. I did, OBV, and we had the most awesome conversation about Smuggler and we just seemed to click. I left feeling so bubbly. I'm really freaking hopeful about this, I think it might happen, but I'm trying to remain pragmatic so as to save myself crushing disappointment because THAT'S never fun. After that my mom and I went on an apartment hunt which was kind of a bust; I'm getting so fed up with this search, nothing I seem to find works, or things I find that would seem to work I can't actually get in touch with anyone to move forward with. Grrr. After that, drove home, had the best lunch of my life, had some champagne with the family to rehash the day, and got a call back from the Sweet Shop to come in FRIDAY, which will be my third time going up to LA this week aye yae yae. Ended the evening with a very distressing call from a good friend who really is having a hard time. the advice I gave to her and really tried to hear myself say so that I adopted it myself is that life really is to fragile and precious  to act like the dark times are all there is, an interminable black hole; it's simply not true and not worth it to live like that; what's the point then, you know?

I want to DO things.

41. Full

Day: August 23, 2011

Song: Sweet Louise, by Belle Brigade

Meal: Carrot and Pineapple Muffin

Admission: Today was one big flurry. Woke up, drove in hellish traffic to work, first making a quick pit stop at Pannikin for my daily, and very necessary, dose of caffeine and muffin love. Then it was off to work, which for some reason flew by. Drove down to La Jolla for my doctors appointment (those are getting pesky), stopped for an after work beer with Diondra in PB, then it was time to go home to prep prep prep for my interview tomorrow. I'm SO NERVOUS. And for some reason really, really have my hopes up, which scares the crap out of me, for lack of a better phrase. I just hope I don't let my tendency to become super shy or the unalterable fact that I look really young disguise the fact that I really feel I can do this job. 

AHHH.

Anyway, I haven't stopped today since writing this now, which feels good for the brain. Also, look how big my hair was today!

40. One Eighty

Day: August 22, 2011

Song: Rave On, by M. Ward

Meal: Muenster Cheese, straight up

Admission: Holy heavens was today a good day! Talk about a complete turn around from yesterday; yesterday, where I felt so crummy about myself and stressed about all the things and factors I seemed incapable of tackling and achieving. Today I kicked butt at job applications (even landed an interview!!!!), apartment coordinating, and friend get togethering. After my appointment with Julie this evening I met up with Noah, Gabe, Andrew, Ashley, and her friend Lindsey at 3rd Corner, my THIRD time in less than a week, woooooops. We shared wine, cheese and bread and had solid, hilarious conversation. Afterward Andrew and I went down to Moonlight Beach to walk off the residual buzz before making our drives home. It was nice to just sit and talk; having company makes me feel warm and bubbly. Until that is, your life is threatened by a flaming rocket plane being hurdled down a hillside... but I digress.

39. C'mon Now

Day: August 21, 2011

Song: White Flag, by Gorillaz

Meal: Tuna Torta Sandwich

Admission: Today I had my appointment at Park La Brea apartments. It was... disappointing to say in the least. Too flip flopping expensive. It would have been so easy to move there, that location has such positive connotations for me it just would have felt good to live there. But I guess this is forcing me to make a new home, with new memories, rather than try to relive and recapture something of the past. It's just a pain in the butt to have to try to find a place. Parents suggested recruiting the help of an agent, because after driving around the area we got overwhelmed with the sheer amount of properties that are for rent.  Ay! Exciting!

38. Life is Weird

Day: August 20, 2011

Song: Black Mirror, by Arcade Fire

Meal: Shrimp Skewer with Watermelon Basil Salad + Wine Flight

Admission: Today after work I met up with Russ. It had been been 7 months since I last saw him. It was such a bizarre mixture of weird, awkward, hilarious, nice, enjoyable, and contentedness.  I'm always struck by how relationships, and intangible connection between two people, can be warped,  torn, reconnected.

Life is weird.

37. Blessed

Day: August 19, 2011

Song: Set Yourself on Fire, by Stars

Meal: Grilled Salmon Salad with Mango Salsa + Sweet Potato Fries

Admission: Today I met up with Elie one last time before she flies off to New York City to attend Columbia grad school. It was a surreal day because we were comparing the stark contrast of where we are now to where we were when we met-- easily the darkest times in both of our lives. It brings up a lot; the struggles that we faced, that we continue to face but have learned through the hardest work we both have ever done how better to combat, the responsibility to combat, sometimes the reluctancy to combat. It also forces us to recognize the remarkable growth we've both achieved; her moving to NY, one step closer to becoming a life saving doctor, me moving to LA, one step closer to who knows what. Regardless, I know that I will have Elie in my heart and in my life forever, and for that I am eternally grateful.

36. Favoritism

Day: August 18, 2011

Song: Help Yourself, Sad Brad Smith, from Up in the Air soundtrack

Meal: Picnic/Feast: baguette and brie, chinese chicken salad, chocolate cupcakes, wine wine wine

Admission: Today was honestly one of the best days I've had in a long time, and I've been lucking out with a pretty long string of solid, good days lately. Mix of productivity, serendipity, and really wonderful company. Ended the night with a drink date with Noah and Andrew, my favorites. I got excited for life today, and it felt almost electric. I haven't felt that way since last summer. It was a serious dose of invigoration for me, which I hadn't realized how much I needed until it came. I may or may not have held a spontaneous, solo dance party in my living room.

35. Ew, Gross

Day: August 17, 2011

Song: Beyond the Sea, by Bobby Darin

Meal: Lemon Cupcake

Admission: The moral of today's story is that getting a ticket absolutely sucks. Not only am I now down 210+ dollars, but I have to spend an inordinately painful amount of time taking traffic school online. I haven't been in school mode since last December, although I'm pretty sure the material itself would make anyones brain feel like absolute mush. I just want to whine and not. do. it.  In other news, I wore my mom's rad turquoise sweater and matching earrings from the 80s. Today was plain. Tomorrow will be great. 

34. Under the Tuscan (?) Sun

Day: August 16, 2011

Song: Inside and Out, by Feist

Meal: Baked Penne, Caeser Salad, Garlic Bread + Wine

Admission: Today was mellowyellow. Woke up, had breakfast and coffee with the family, went to a class on base, came home, baked brownies, watched some SFU, and went over to Kari's house for a little NCL reunion with her mom, my mom, and Kendra and her mom. Their house is truly stunning, really what makes Fallbrook worthwhile in a nutshell. I felt like I was in Italy. Super relaxing to just sit, talk, eat, drink-- simple pleasures that make you unable to deny how lucky you truly are.

33. L-O-V-E

Day: August 15, 2011

Song: Back to You, Shania Twain

Meal: Grilled chicken salad with black beans

Admission: Today was the most fun I've had in a really, really long time. It was my first wedding party event, Kendra's engagement party, up in Newport. It was so wonderful to meet everyone and just feel the joy that each and every person felt. After dinner we just went little kid on everyone--got lollipops and played tag on the beach, danced the night away, and got soft serve ice cream cones on the drive home. Kendra is one of the most beautiful people I know, inside and out, and I am overwhelmed with happiness for her.

32. So Fresh

Day: August 14, 2011

Song: 127 Hours Soundtrack

Meal: Sausage, Bacon, and Omelette at Brunch Buffet

Admission: Spent the day down in PB with Diondra. Had brunch, spent money we don't have at a few thrift stores, baked a key lime pie, and ended up crashing watching 127 Hours which, by the way, was incredibly striking. Humans are just incredible if they want to be. Sort of a slap to the face for my wallowing in feelings of inadequacy.